DIVORCE COACH JILL
  • Home
  • About
  • Divorce Coaching
  • Services
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • Thriving Through Divorce Online Group Coaching Program
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of Use
  • Disclaimer

Divorce coach jill
- ​Blog -

relationships after divorce - TOP 3 things to consider

1/14/2020

0 Comments

 
Picture
When you are going through a divorce, you may feel hurt, guilty, alone, scared – a lot of very difficult feelings. Starting a new relationship is appealing because it can help you feel less lonely and it can provide support when it may be difficult to get support from others who don’t understand what you’re going through. However, relationships take time, energy and a lot of compromise. Thinking through what is best for you and your family will help you determine when to move forward with a new relationship.

​Some things to consider when starting a new relationship after divorce:

  1. Have you mourned the loss of the marriage? Divorce is like a death and you need time to mourn, even if you wanted the divorce. You may feel sadness, anger and many other emotions that you need to go through in order to move on and be open to another relationship.
  2. Have you learned what went wrong in your marriage and understand what you can do differently in your next relationship? It is important to examine your marriage and find out what you did to contribute to the issues. Usually it isn’t just one person’s fault when a marriage ends. If you don’t work on your relationship skills, you may end up repeating the problems you had in your marriage.
  3. Are your children ok? If your children are struggling, they need a parent who is available both physically and emotionally. They don’t want to share you with another person who they don’t know. Determine if you can balance taking care of your children’s needs with a new relationship.
 
Look into your situation and assess where you and your children are emotionally. This will help you determine if you’re ready for a relationship.
 
There are parents who don’t consider starting a new relationship because they feel that they need to focus on their children. They feel that they can’t have a relationship at all until their children are out of the house. Although some may think that this is best for children, there can be some negative consequences to this.
 
A parent who focuses primarily on their children may find that they don’t have any time to develop their own life, hobbies, interests, friendships or take care of themself. This works for young children as they want and need their parent’s undivided attention. But as children get older, they start to develop their own life, friends and activities. If their mom or dad is solely focused on them, the children may feel responsible for their parent’s happiness and feel guilty that they don’t want to spend all their time with the parent.
 
There is a middle ground. You can have a relationship and your own life after a divorce while putting your children as a priority. One of the reasons to develop your own life outside of your children is that you are your children’s main role model. If you are happy and have a full life, it encourages your children to have that too.
 
There is no one right or wrong answer. Think through what you want and take your time with every decision. Talk to a trusted friend or therapist to help you think clearly. Balance your own needs with that of your children. You know what is best for your children and for yourself. Have faith in yourself that if you take the time and space you need, you will come up with what will be best for you and your family.
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Author

    Jill Barnett Kaufman is a Divorce Coach, Therapist, Parent Educator and Divorce Mediator. She is an experienced professional who helps clients discover new ways to resolve a variety of challenges when considering divorce, starting the process of divorce or are already divorced. 

    Picture

    Archives

    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020

    Categories

    All
    Communication
    Co Parenting
    Co-parenting
    Divorce
    Forgiveness
    Marriage
    Relationships
    Well Being
    Well-being

    RSS Feed

If you are in crisis or in need of emergency assistance, please call 911.
Join the Facebook group Separation and Divorce Support Community by clicking below: 
Divorce Support Community
What Clients Are Saying:
​

"I happened to come upon Thriving Through Divorce on Facebook. I can genuinely state that it was one of the best decisions that I have made in this entire process. The support, guidance, caring, information - both tactical and emotional was extremely helpful. This was not some theoretical, book/psychology focused approach - It is real life and real impact! I could expand on this for quite a bit more, but suffice to say that I was more than thankful for having happened to find Jill and her program and the group has been an amazing blessing. Thank you Jill on behalf of all of us."

S.Y. Denver, CO

"I spoke with Jill when my marriage first broke down.  Her intelligent and compassionate guidance helped me make positive choices for myself and my children during the divorce process.  Now, I’m on the other side, living my new chapter.  Her book is a valuable tool in processing feelings, approaching challenges, and setting goals for the future.  Thank you, Jill!"
 
Patti S. New Jersey

"I am truly grateful for participating in the "Thriving Through Divorce Group Coaching Program" developed by Jill. It was refreshing to know that divorce will not define who I am. This program provided great tools to aide in managing and working through the emotions that come up during the divorce process. Jill's knowledge and personal experience with divorce helped me to learn what common mistakes to avoid during the divorce process. It was a breath of fresh air to know what I wasn't the only person going through such a major life event."
 
J.B. Iowa


"I spoke to Jill over six months ago and now I'm back to reflect. I'm stronger and in a better place in my life. Jill helped springboard me to where I am today and I'm grateful for her help."
J.A.
Email: info@divorcecoachjill.com
Phone: 609-400-2888
​
Connect with us: 
To get more information, click the button below: 
more information
For our privacy policy, click here,  for our Terms of Use, click here and for our Disclaimer, click here.
  • Home
  • About
  • Divorce Coaching
  • Services
  • Contact
  • Blog
  • Thriving Through Divorce Online Group Coaching Program
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of Use
  • Disclaimer